I told them I was growing a mustache for Movember, the men’s health awareness initiative I mentioned in last week’s column, but I was also planning to disguise myself as former Congressman Bob Barr — who was in the audience — and attend a meeting of the uber-liberal Move On organization and tell them I was ready to support them on gun control just to see the look on their faces.
I thought it was funny. I don’t think Mr. Barr did. Maybe it was the mustache.
In truth, I didn’t tell many jokes. I just reported what I have read and seen in the news recently. After all, what could be funnier than a bunch of disgruntled losers starting a petition to have Georgia secede from the union?
You can’t make that stuff up. If my memory serves me correctly, we tried that once before and all we got for our trouble was a bunch of carpetbaggers who never went back home and the Gone With the Wind museum on the Square.
And then there is my boy, Chip Rogers, (R-Woodstock.) Once a bright and rising star in the Legislature, Mr. Rogers was majority leader in the senate until this week when he was mercifully replaced by Sen. Ronnie Chance (R-Tyrone.) The Chipster has done several weird things that have provided me column fodder, but none greater than his recent gathering at the Capitol to discuss Agenda 21, a plan allegedly driven by the United Nations to take over privately owned property through land use ordinances and rezoning passed by local governments. (Attention Cobb County Commissioners: You heard it here first. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.)
Supposedly, Agenda 21 is being facilitated by a mind control technique, called the Delphi Technique, which was developed by the Rand Corp. during the Cold War.
I would suggest that our Ambassador to Outer Space Cynthia McKinney move over. I think Chip Rogers is about to join her on Uranus. (Or is somebody playing with my mind?)
To prove that Republicans don’t have a monopoly on goofiness, we talked about the comments of former Democratic Party Chair Bill Waldrop, who was quoted in the MDJ criticizing “that fellow Froffenheimer who goes around in that wheel cart he’s got, talking nasty about all of us.” I think he was referring to nationally-syndicated columnist Charles Krauthammer, who goes around in a wheelchair and in my opinion, makes more sense seated than Mr. Waldrop does standing on his hind legs.
I reminded the group that we had recently held an election that despite the ranting wingnuts on the fringes of both parties was conducted without tanks on the Square or riots in the streets. We can tease those in the political arena as I did at lunch and not be arrested and tossed in some hellhole. A young woman can talk about the importance of getting a good education without getting shot in the throat for her efforts.
That is because we are a nation of laws. I cited Lisa Godbey Wood, the chief federal judge of the U.S. Southern District of Georgia, who talks about “the majesty of the law,” which she says is evident in the “plain old everyday cases,” not necessarily the high-profile ones that come along every few years and dominate the headlines.
Does the law always work perfectly? No, but then I have been known to misplace a comma or two in my time. What works is in our system of law we are innocent until proven guilty and have the right to a fair trial by our peers. That doesn’t happen everywhere.
There may be times when we in the media disagree over the public’s right to know versus the accused’s right to a fair trial. Thank goodness, we live in a society where there is both freedom of the press and where we are given a chance to prove our innocence.
I think Cobb County has one of the best judicial systems in the nation and a fine array of attorneys. I was honored to be with them. And that’s no joke.
On another subject: Kudos and more kudos to the Junior ROTC program at Osborne High School. The guys won the national championship of the Raider Challenge, which I understand is like elite Ranger training and the women came in second, both competing against much larger schools.
I have a soft spot in my heart for Osborne because they always seem to be the underdogs.
But not this time. This time they are winners.
You can reach Dick Yarbrough at firstname.lastname@example.org or P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, Georgia 31139.